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millarificTitle: It Doesn't Feel Like Cheating
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
millari
Characters: Gaeta, Baltar, implied OFC
Pairing: Baltar/Gaeta
Rating: PG-13 (for non-graphic depictions of sex)
Wordcount: 570
Warnings: Incredibly frustrating infidelity that will make you want to punch Gaius Baltar in the face (if you didn't already).
Summary: The one-sided, step-by-step dissolution of a relationship.
Author's Note: This was written for the![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
bsg_epics Shipper War Challenge. Prompted by the wonderful geekbynight.
It doesn't feel like cheating, when his newest intern – a fetching brunette who can barely type - catches him watching her bustle about the office, and throws back a lascivious smile. He watches her file a minute. It's nothing but harmless flirting, he tells himself.
It doesn't feel like cheating when he sends Felix off to yet another round of intractable union negotiations, fully aware that it's her shift again in an hour. If he's planning anything, it's just to look. He isn't planning anything. He isn't.
It doesn't feel like cheating when she perches herself on his desk to ask him some questions about the directions he just gave her. Nor when he notices she's not wearing anything under her skirt; he's not blind, after all.
It doesn't feel like cheating when she's gasping through an orgasm, underneath him on his bed. It feels amazing.
It still doesn't feel like cheating when she's smoking one of his cigarillos, skirt still hiked up around her hips. No, it's not cheating if he already can't remember her name.
It only starts to feel like cheating when Felix arrives three hours later, tired and exhausted, but proud and happy about a significant breakthrough in the union talks. After looking around to make sure they're alone, he gleefully pushes Gaius into the chair and kisses him deeply. His kisses taste strangely like ash.
It starts to feel like cheating when he realizes his intern (Lily, he's found out almost against his will) is making a point of throwing him significant looks, specifically when Felix is around. He spends half his time casting terrified glances back and forth between the two of them.
Yet it doesn't feel like cheating when they frak again, because this time, he only allows her to give him a blow job. He's not sure why, but this conditional nature to the sex helps.
But when Felix is working in his office and Gaius tells her that it has to end between them – only to have Felix walk back in just as she says, go frak yourself - that's when it definitely feels like he's been cheating all along.
It feels even more so when his lover's eyes turn stricken, and Gaius can only watch as he packs an overnight bag, grunting that he'll get the rest of his things tomorrow.
After that, it feels so much like cheating that it seems redundant when Felix actually names it, in a tone so very sad and quiet and full of assurances that he won't let this interfere with their work. It feels so redundant in fact, that Gaius lets this annoy him, and soon he begins the work of reinventing himself as a victim of Felix's expectations.
Three months later, when Felix is waking him from another night spent in a stupor at his desk, he reaches for his pills to block out Felix's prattling about the union that should have been broken months ago, while Lily emerges from his bedroom like a smug, decadent, half-clothed sentry. A bored Gaius doesn't bother to look at her, but he does light her cigarillo, briefly pleased at the way the act instantly reduces Felix's implied accusations to a blessedly stony silence.
No, he assures himself as he watches Felix turn on his heel in disdain - it was never cheating at all.
Author:
millariCharacters: Gaeta, Baltar, implied OFC
Pairing: Baltar/Gaeta
Rating: PG-13 (for non-graphic depictions of sex)
Wordcount: 570
Warnings: Incredibly frustrating infidelity that will make you want to punch Gaius Baltar in the face (if you didn't already).
Summary: The one-sided, step-by-step dissolution of a relationship.
Author's Note: This was written for the
bsg_epics Shipper War Challenge. Prompted by the wonderful geekbynight. It doesn't feel like cheating, when his newest intern – a fetching brunette who can barely type - catches him watching her bustle about the office, and throws back a lascivious smile. He watches her file a minute. It's nothing but harmless flirting, he tells himself.
It doesn't feel like cheating when he sends Felix off to yet another round of intractable union negotiations, fully aware that it's her shift again in an hour. If he's planning anything, it's just to look. He isn't planning anything. He isn't.
It doesn't feel like cheating when she perches herself on his desk to ask him some questions about the directions he just gave her. Nor when he notices she's not wearing anything under her skirt; he's not blind, after all.
It doesn't feel like cheating when she's gasping through an orgasm, underneath him on his bed. It feels amazing.
It still doesn't feel like cheating when she's smoking one of his cigarillos, skirt still hiked up around her hips. No, it's not cheating if he already can't remember her name.
It only starts to feel like cheating when Felix arrives three hours later, tired and exhausted, but proud and happy about a significant breakthrough in the union talks. After looking around to make sure they're alone, he gleefully pushes Gaius into the chair and kisses him deeply. His kisses taste strangely like ash.
It starts to feel like cheating when he realizes his intern (Lily, he's found out almost against his will) is making a point of throwing him significant looks, specifically when Felix is around. He spends half his time casting terrified glances back and forth between the two of them.
Yet it doesn't feel like cheating when they frak again, because this time, he only allows her to give him a blow job. He's not sure why, but this conditional nature to the sex helps.
But when Felix is working in his office and Gaius tells her that it has to end between them – only to have Felix walk back in just as she says, go frak yourself - that's when it definitely feels like he's been cheating all along.
It feels even more so when his lover's eyes turn stricken, and Gaius can only watch as he packs an overnight bag, grunting that he'll get the rest of his things tomorrow.
After that, it feels so much like cheating that it seems redundant when Felix actually names it, in a tone so very sad and quiet and full of assurances that he won't let this interfere with their work. It feels so redundant in fact, that Gaius lets this annoy him, and soon he begins the work of reinventing himself as a victim of Felix's expectations.
Three months later, when Felix is waking him from another night spent in a stupor at his desk, he reaches for his pills to block out Felix's prattling about the union that should have been broken months ago, while Lily emerges from his bedroom like a smug, decadent, half-clothed sentry. A bored Gaius doesn't bother to look at her, but he does light her cigarillo, briefly pleased at the way the act instantly reduces Felix's implied accusations to a blessedly stony silence.
No, he assures himself as he watches Felix turn on his heel in disdain - it was never cheating at all.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2012-06-03 10:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-04 12:34 am (UTC)I'm flattered that you've read this four times. :) Thank you.
no subject
Date: 2012-06-05 08:13 pm (UTC)Loss of teeth included!
no subject
Date: 2012-06-05 08:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-06 03:40 am (UTC)This fic was one of the fastest things I've ever written. It practically came out this way without me thinking much about it, but you're right - it parallels the decline of their relationship. I knew there was a reason it felt right. I honestly didn't plan this parallel, but I think my brain knew what needed to happen, because something about breaking apart the rigid structure of the text felt absolutely right just there. I remember thinking it needed to change, and I guess that was why.